Wednesday, December 01, 2010

Life is different

My sis and I were talking last week about pregnancies. She was single during her twenties and dating a lot. She said that she never expected to be a mom and wasn't too worried about it. She felt that it would or would not happen in its own time. {insert frustration here}

How can we birthed from the same uterus, raised in the same household and have such a different way of viewing this? I mean, to be honest, I always thought that I would marry in my thirties and have to start thinking about this for a few years instead of the head-banging-nail-biting 13 years it has been. My goodness, 13 years is a teenager!

In my mind I always figured that I would either have one or the other, baby/family or career. I now have a pseudo form of both...neither remotely close to what I had thought. Maybe that is the greater issue, the fact that unknowingly I actually had a vision for my life. I tend to think of myself a lot more free flowing and relax than I really am. So what do I have right now? A completely different life than I would ever have imagined, nothing like what I grew up with and not bad either....just different. It is kinda of like I closed my eyes between summer and winter and woke up to a different looking landscape but underneath all that snow is the same land that I always loved.

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